Saturday, July 28, 2012

My Weight and Support

I should've titled this post "Ugh!" again but since that was the title of my last post, I thought I should come up with something new. Plus, I want to talk about support too.

Okay, first the weight part. I have no idea what is going on. I'm not eating a ton of calories but my weight seems to be in a stall again. I record my weight every Monday and as of last Monday, my previous week's weight loss was .06. It seems I'm on that same kind of path for this week's weight loss too and that literally SUCKS BIGTIME!! I know whatever is going on will pass and my weight will keep going in the right direction. I just wish it would hurry up. I'm inpatient! Besides, as I talked about in my post below, I feel this pressure to lose 80 pounds by December 7th and weight loss of less than a pound a week for two weeks isn't helping very much with that. I guess it's time to really buckle down with my diet, tracking my food and my exercise. Okay. I'm done whining for now!

On to the topic of support. I truly believe it is a big key to success in this journey. I started the monthly support group offered by a local hospital earlier this month. One of the usual speakers, Dr. Ashmore, is the Director of Behavorial Health Sevices at the hospital. During his presentation he mentioned a weekly group he does for weight loss surgery patients. I was immediately interested because, although the monthly support groups are great, I don't think that is enough. At least not for me anyway. I still plan on going to them in addition to the weekly group hosted by Dr. Ashmore. Anyway, Dr. Ashmore said he needs to see anyone wanting to join the weekly group for a private office appointment first to make sure you are a good fit. I had my appointment with him last Thursday and he said I'd be good for the group. Yay! I'm excited to start it next Thursday evening. During my appointment though, he asked me what my goal weight is. I told him I don't really know as I feel it's really too early to set one. I did tell him though that I most likely will want a BMI that is considered normal and why. On a side note, I haven't discussed it here but my Mom suffers with stage 4 renal (kidney) failure. My sister is currently getting tested to see if she is a match. However, if she isn't, I can't get tested until I have a BMI in the normal range. Now, back to the story. I told him that Brittany, the P.A. who works with my surgeon, said something about 155 being a good goal weight. Since I started at 304, that is pretty much half my body weight. On two different occassions Dr. Ashmore made a comment about it being half my body weight and how he couldn't believe Brittany would choose that much weight loss. He then followed it up both times saying how it could be done but it will be "very hard" and "a lot of work". Okay, I get that but those words aren't what bothered me or at least I don't think they were. It was the WAY he said it. It felt like to me that the tone of his voice was saying that losing 150 pounds was a virtual impossibility. I don't know why I'm letting it bother me but I am. Maybe it's because he is an expert in dealing with overweight people and weight loss surgery patients and if he is negative about me doing it, then maybe I can't. The thing is, I know I can if I do the work. I guess it really comes down to me doubting my ability to do it. Food has controlled me for years and despite having VSG, it still does. No, I can't eat a huge amount at any one time, but I still have the ability to "cheat" my sleeve by grazing and I'm scared to death about falling back into that habit and not being successful. There, I said it. I'm afraid of failure. I'm sure what I'm going through is normal but it is the reason I so firmly believe in support. I think support gives me, or anyone for that matter, the best chance of being successful on losing my excess weight and maintaining it for life. All that being said, I am glad I went to see Dr. Ashmore. He really is caring and supportive even though I didn't make it sound like that with my earlier comments. I really look forward to joining his weekly group to learn all I can to help me and so that I can connect with others also going through this journey.

I wish everyone well!

~Amy

2 comments:

  1. I know all too well about those stalled times and barely any loss weeks girl! I wish I had the answer as to how to "fix" it - I had it happening when I would eat 400-500 cals day after day! I am going to start staggering a higher calorie/carb day in once a week I think to my diet. Just to shock and jump start my system -- going to see if it helps my stalls.

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  2. That's actually a great idea and I've heard it worked for other people. I did have a higher calorie day on Thursday and Friday my scale was back down to the lower end of the 3 pounds. Today, it was the same as yesterday. We shall see. Good luck and let me know how it goes for you.

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